Two Words You Never Want To See Together

[Fire Watch]

Simple concept, give us two words you never want to hear together in your life.

I'll start.

Chainsaw enema.

[Lima India Bravo]

Fat Free

(I know...not quite the same, but have you tasted some of that crap?!)

[WJStafford]

I'm pregnant

[WJStafford]

It's yours

[JediMindTrick]

President Palin

[Claymore]

Testicular Hockey

[CID_0687]

Penile injection.

[Claymore]

Involuntary Donor

[khigh]

Government Intervention

[sisyphus]

mandatory volunteerism
benevolent dictator

[Getty Girl]

President Palin


why not...?

[Theranna]

Actress Beyonce

[Army Wife]

Pres. Biden...

Small incision

Smell this...

critical failure...

[BostonPatriot]

Maybe this one got overlooked for being too obvious :rolleyes:

President Obama

[ERJohnson]

accidental circumcision

[ERJohnson]

free herpes

[ERJohnson]

fecal dinner

[ExDem]

Ok, this is gross but there is a medical office near me that is called "The Wound Center." It is supposedly a place where people are sent that cannot get cuts, wounds etc. to heal. My husband calls it the PUS PALACE, and I just hate it. I will drive 50 miles out of the way to avoid passing that building when the husband is in the car. So yeah, my two words are:

PUS PALACE

[alexz2317]

I Do

[rckirby]

anger, proctologist

[supreme_war_Pig]

Simple concept, give us two words you never want to hear together in your life.

I'll start.

Chainsaw enema.

:eek:

[supreme_war_Pig]

Aggressive Audit

[ThrowCop]

Testicular



Torsion...




https://www.google.com/health/ref/Testicular+torsion

[ERJohnson]

government help

[ALBOB2]

Fire - Watch......................Gives me the creeps just thinking about it. :sick:

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Umm...

Breast reduction :shifty:

(I, for one, CANNOT believe ALBOB didn't use that first)

[JimGP20]

**** sandwich
mandatory volunteerism
benevolent dictator

I would delete that first line if I were you. It's an instaban violation.

[JimGP20]

rectal drill

[Dragon1963]

Blank check

[drylok]

Constitutional

Convention

[Army Wife]

Well Officer...

[ALBOB2]

Umm...

Breast reduction :shifty:

(I, for one, CANNOT believe ALBOB didn't use that first)



:eek:


:wall:


I'm sooooo ashamed. :((

[Ardathair]

Efficient Bureaucracy

[JimGP20]

Burlap condom

[Kelzan]

Puppy sandwich

[sisyphus]

Liberal President

tax hike

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Yankees fan

Sox fan

Cowboys fan

[JimGP20]

Eagles fan

Sixers fan

Phillies fan

Flyers fan

:cool:

[JenyEliza]

Timeout Issued or You're Banned. ;) :mrgreen:

[WJStafford]

burning itch

[Rick Rhetoric]

Windows Vista

[JimGP20]

Placenta soup

[Sennik]

You're fired

[JenyEliza]

You're fired

Meh. That one's not so bad. Got that in April (workforce reduction).

I'm going back to school full time in January, on Obama's "Moms go back to school" plan. :dance:

Life is good.

[Army Wife]

Burlap condom

OUCH!!


Military Intelligence

[JimGP20]

Salami underwear (unless, of course, there's crackers in the picture)

[Fire Watch]

Moderator Stuball

[johnrocks]

Moderator Stuball

:))

[Sennik]

Meh. That one's not so bad. Got that in April (workforce reduction).

I'm going back to school full time in January, on Obama's "Moms go back to school" plan. :dance:

Life is good.

I'm finally in a job that I actually love so for me it would not be a good thing.

But, how about this one...

Accidental Amputation

[JimGP20]

Uttered by a surgeon.... "Oh crap"

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Broken condom

Lakers championship

Cowboys championship

[JimGP20]

Leathery cleavage

[BillBrown]

President Obama

[Kelzan]

President Pelosi :sick:

[Kelzan]

Uttered by a surgeon.... "Oh crap"

LOL.

By a surgeon looking at my insides while operating, "What's this?"

[melinda]

this is a fun thread .... :)

[ThrowCop]

Gangrenous Discharge

[BostonPatriot]

Placenta soup:sick: ewww

[ERJohnson]

That's Hot!

[sisyphus]

Honest politician (a rarity)

[Nik Notorious]

Raiders win

[JimGP20]

Tabasco enima

[CID_0687]

Uncle Daddy :eek:

[bayoubill]

Yankees win

[ALBOB2]

Breast Reduction



(Screw you Funkenstein, that's MY territory.:evil: )

[melinda]

Uncle Daddy :eek:

:))

[JimGP20]

Uncle Mommy :eek::eek:

[ThrowCop]

retinal explosion

[Dr. Funkenstein]

anal leakage

[JimGP20]

anal leakage


Not quite as bad as "anal gusher". :eek:

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Not quite as bad as "anal gusher". :eek:
Never.

Eating.

Olestra.

Again.

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Hitler revered

[ThrowCop]

woolen jockstrap

[JimGP20]

butt butter

[gwhughes]

Naked butcher

[gwhughes]

Tasty flatulence

[gwhughes]

French armpit

[ALBOB2]

From your dentist: "Slight pinch" or "Little pressure" :((

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Breast Reduction



(Screw you Funkenstein, that's MY territory.:evil: )
I'm not deleting my post...:mad:

[Kelzan]

Vomit soup

[Talk2Bill]

capsasian Catheter

[Talk2Bill]

diarrhea milkshake

[ThrowCop]

Perineum rupture

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Perineum rupture
Holy ****...

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Penguins win

[gwhughes]

Alcohol shortage

[markd]

Perineum ruptureJesus man, what goes on in your brain???

[Gaby77]

As my friend (who is an ER doc) said the other day:
Penis and necrotic should never have to be used in one sentence.

[Canoedude]

Last Call

Penis Hatchet

Meat Curtains

tongue zit

seeping gash

Senator Franken

Senator Snowe

sharp suppository

flaccid anything

[ALBOB2]

I'm not deleting my post...:mad:


Wouldn't dream of asking you to. Just proving it sounds better coming from me.:mrgreen:

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Jesus man, what goes on in your brain???
This is a thought I'm certain ski has often.

[SisterMary]

Run. Fast.

[Kelzan]

Used steak

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Spears offspring

[SisterMary]

Previously ingested.

[ThrowCop]

Salmonella Sundae...

[gwhughes]

Jesus man, what goes on in your brain???

His brain? Till just now I thought he said perineum rApture.....

Followed by DrFunk's "Holy ****" which I thought was strangely appropriate at the time:)

[RayMan]

This thread

[ALBOB2]

His brain? Till just now I thought he said perineum rApture.....

Followed by DrFunk's "Holy ****" which I thought was strangely appropriate at the time:)


:))Oh dear God. I think you just past post of the day and went straight to the head of the line for post of the YEAR. I can barely breathe I'm laughing so hard. Bravo gwhughes, bravo.:clap:

[Kelzan]

Fecal Salad

[melinda]

premature ejaculation ....

[melinda]

As my friend (who is an ER doc) said the other day:
Penis and necrotic should never have to be used in one sentence.

:eek:

[Army Wife]

Loraina Bobbet




:mrgreen:

[melinda]

As my friend (who is an ER doc) said the other day:
Penis and necrotic should never have to be used in one sentence.

I have often told the story about the guy who blew up his pecker ... my sister works in a hospital and a guy came in one night with his penis blown up. He'd been using one of those 'enhancers' and apparently something went bad wrong........ :eek:

[Fire Watch]

balloon boy

[sisyphus]

Institutional racism
tornado & mobilehome

[Talk2Bill]

Perineum rupture

I did not think anyone would beat diarrhea milkshake .....:)) that is some messed up stuff

one might it taint funny

[Panhead0422]

Arrest

Drunk

[sisyphus]

Vasectomy oops

[Army Wife]

[overheard by a redneck..]

Watch this....

[ogibillm]

paternity suit

[Army Wife]

shot dead


....though that then begs the question - as apposed to shot alive...?

[alexz2317]

"Ear Infection"


I'm in some serious pain..

[Dancer]

Hurricane Rick ;) :razz:

[JimGP20]

vaginal echo

[Army Wife]

"Ear Infection"


I'm in some serious pain..

A heating pad is your friend when you have an ear infection. I have had so many I can't count them. The heat on that side of my head would help with the pain and make me sleepy as I didn't feel the pain while asleep it was twice as good ;)

[CaffeineHat]

brain bleed

I heard it recently after my 9 year old suffered a fall on a freshly waxed floor. She's fine now, but hearing those words made me want to hurl.

sorry if it's a buzz kill:cry:

[ERJohnson]

Pedophilia preschool

[melinda]

vaginal echo

I'm worried about you......

[JimGP20]

NASCAR Chase

[ThrowCop]

carrion casserole

[gwhughes]

Turkey bacon

[CID_0687]

sexual frustration

[JimGP20]

carrion casserole


or maybe....

carrion luggage ? :cool:

[ThrowCop]

or maybe....

carrion luggage ? :cool::lol:

It's a good thing I don't have Photoshop fired up...

[Panhead0422]

Breast

Reduction

[drylok]

No Guns

[ERJohnson]

agathokakological bunny

[Panhead0422]

No

Ammo

[melinda]

beer's gone....

[markd]

beer's gone....ouch

[Army Wife]

no bacon

no chocolate

no Mini

..your bill

[Spaceman Spiff]

Pope elopes.

(Actually, that might be kinda funny.)

[ERJohnson]

incoming artillery

[Lego-Man]

Honest politician (a rarity)

Why wouldn't you want to hear those two words together?

[Lego-Man]

Seatless bicycle ...


on ...


bumpy road

[sisyphus]

Seatless bicycle ...


on ...


bumpy road

Ouch
:((:((

[Panhead0422]

friendly
fire

[Panhead0422]

busted
butt

[gwhughes]

Condom tester

[ALBOB2]

no Mini




Huh? :confused:

[ALBOB2]

Re Enlist :eek:

[JimGP20]

Ben Folds :lol:

[Army Wife]

Huh? :confused:
:mrgreen:

[outfromunder]

Bend over

[JimGP20]

Bend over


Foul :naughty:... that's the same as Ben Folds. :lol:

[drylok]

You're Banned

Wait, does that count as 2 words in this thread? :shifty:

[gwhughes]

go play

[outfromunder]

Foul :naughty:... that's the same as Ben Folds. :lol:

Nuh uh. Ben Folds is obscure and sides.... I didnt see that post.

[ALBOB2]

:mrgreen:


Sorry, I still don't get it. "No Mini" to me would mean no jaws of life to get my ass out of that rediculous thing. :confused:

[Lego-Man]

Thermonuclear suntan

[Lego-Man]

Assembly Required

[ALBOB2]

Assembly Required

In Japanese :((

[Lego-Man]

"Look, quintuplets!"

[Dragon1963]

Dry Heat

[davetexas]

liberal elected

[Army Wife]

Sorry, I still don't get it. "No Mini" to me would mean no jaws of life to get my ass out of that ridiculous thing. :confused:

having no mini is a sad sad thing...oh and my mini has a better safety rating than mt F150 so ppphhhttt!

[JimGP20]

penile splint

[Panhead0422]

Broke
Dick

[JimGP20]

^^^^^^^^^
Bannable post

[bayoubill]

Yankees win...

[drylok]

Heavy

Rains

[JimGP20]

Dry socket

[CaughtInTheMiddle]

Projectile vomit

Projectile diarrhea

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Steelers win

[CaughtInTheMiddle]

Duke Basketball

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Dean Dome :razz:

[JimGP20]

Calvin Schiraldi

[CaughtInTheMiddle]

Dean Dome :razz:

Dr. Funkenstein :evil:

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Dr. Funkenstein :evil:
<tearing up>

[CaughtInTheMiddle]

<tearing up>

just giving you grief man. :dance:

[supreme_war_Pig]

Hmmm....sorry guys......

Agressive Homosexual

:eek:

Restroom Closed

Extensive Roadwork

Broken Airplane

Terminal Velocity

[Panhead0422]

Terminal
Ennui

[Lego-Man]

Explosive athlete's-foot (I hope a hyphenated word counts as a single).

[rckirby]

Steelers win

Steelers rule

[JimGP20]

Nut vice :eek:

[Dragon1963]

clean living

[Panhead0422]

Dog!!!!

Bite!!!!

[EnchantedFrog]

Flying Alligator

[JenyEliza]

President Obama

[EnchantedFrog]

Elderly Nudist

[nortman]

Umm...

Breast reduction :shifty:

(I, for one, CANNOT believe ALBOB didn't use that first)
I've never understood how that surgery was ever developed.

[nortman]

Efficient Bureaucracy
It'll never happen.

[nortman]

Yankees fan

Sox fan

Cowboys fanIggles fan. :mrgreen:

[nortman]

Moderator Stuball

:))

[nortman]

Uttered by a surgeon.... "Oh crap"
Uttered by a pilot........uttered by the bus driver.......uttered by the president when he mistakes the nuclear codes for the code to send out for $100/pound beef......... etc.

[nortman]

Wouldn't dream of asking you to. Just proving it sounds better coming from me.:mrgreen:

:))

[nortman]

incoming artillery

friendly fire

[nortman]

Steelers win

Plus one

[JenyEliza]

I've never understood how that surgery was ever developed.

You would if you had to haul around a set of GGGGG boobs like my grandmother did.

She lived in pain her entire adult life because of her gigantic boobs. Had to have her bras custom made.

There is NOTHING wonderful about having a hugely enlarged chest.

Breast reduction surgery gives those women their lives back. It gives them tremendous quality of life. I wish my grandmother could have had the surgery. Her life would have been very different.

Fortunately, my daughter and I did not inherit her endowment.

[JenyEliza]

My Momma

[nortman]

You would if you had to haul around a set of GGGGG boobs like my grandmother did.

She lived in pain her entire adult life because of her gigantic boobs. Had to have her bras custom made.

There is NOTHING wonderful about having a hugely enlarged chest.

Breast reduction surgery gives those women their lives back. It gives them tremendous quality of life. I wish my grandmother could have had the surgery. Her life would have been very different.

Fortunately, my daughter and I did not inherit her endowment.It was just a joke.

[JenyEliza]

It was just a joke.

It's not a joke to women who have to live with oversized chests. Really un-funny.

[gwhughes]

dear lord


not two words I hate to hear together, just a reaction.

[Dragon1963]

locked out

As in you ****ed your roomate/wife/girlfriend off.

[Panhead0422]

Sword
Cut

[alexz2317]

It's not a joke to women who have to live with oversized chests. Really un-funny.
I thought it was hilarious.

[Panhead0422]

Ditto.

[ConstitutionHugger]

President Obama


AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Saddened me greatly when i heard those words

[ConstitutionHugger]

Government Run

or

Government Controlled


One that's almost a scary as president obama is President Hillary

[Panhead0422]

Seals

Clubs

[Panhead0422]

Asteroid

Impact

[Panhead0422]

Vampire

Bait

[ERJohnson]

open relationship

[Panhead0422]

Hate

Sex

[ALBOB2]

(When your "friend" is describing the blind date he just set you up with.)

Good personality

Nice person

Somewhat eccentric

Loves cats

[Dr. Funkenstein]

Hate

Sex
Let's not get hasty here...who are we talking about "hate sex" WITH?

;)

[Dr. Funkenstein]

(When your "friend" is describing the blind date he just set you up with.)

Good personality

Nice person

Somewhat eccentric

Loves cats
Also...

"Watches 'Medium'"

"Loves Yanni"

[Army Wife]

Loves cats

Now that's the deal breaker there my friend!

[ALBOB2]

Now that's the deal breaker there my friend!


Not so fast, I'm owned by two myself. Including the stray kitten I rescued one year ago. But when getting set up on a blind date, that's NOT something I'd want to hear. :confused:

[JimGP20]

Lumpy fart

[Dragon1963]

good luck

[putputpanorama]

wet flatuence

[ConstitutionHugger]

watch this
Usually preceeded by "hold my beer, and"

[Panhead0422]

Let's not get hasty here...who are we talking about "hate sex" WITH?

;)

I was referring to those bar room days when you thought you had things going your way, you don't want to hear the words "hate sex" enter the conversation. :mrgreen:

[S.E.]

Not tonight.

[putputpanorama]

that it?

[nortman]

Not tonight.I see you're married.

[ConstitutionHugger]

I see you're married.

My wife and I must be the exception, Those words have never been said in our house:confused:

[RayMan]

My wife and I must be the exception, Those words have never been said in our house:confused:

Ah, newlyweds. :whistle:

[S.E.]

I see you're married.

:mrgreen: Indeed.

[CID_0687]

Ah, newlyweds. :whistle:
My thoughts exactly.

:wall:

[JimGP20]

My thoughts exactly.

:wall:


I've been married for 8 years now, and those words are never heard at my house either. :cool:

[Fire Watch]

"That's it?"

[Dragon1963]

blood feud

[JimGP20]

Got shrinkage ?

[Dr. Funkenstein]

bra hooks

[JimGP20]

Emergency colonoscopy

[TW-Andrea]

Sorry if this was done already to lazy to go back through all of them......
President Pelosi

[JimGP20]

Sorry if this was done already to lazy to go back through all of them......
President Pelosi


Nope.... until your post, no one here has reached that level of warpage. :cool:

[ConstitutionHugger]

Originally Posted by RayMan http://forums.hannity.com/firestorm/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://forums.hannity.com/showthread.php?p=63092751#post63092751)
Ah, newlyweds. :whistle:



My thoughts exactly.

:wall:

That's just what happens when you marry a beautiful "church girl" that waited

[ConstitutionHugger]

Sorry if this was done already to lazy to go back through all of them......
President Pelosi

Thanks for giving me a heart attack at 24yrs old from fright

[sadiepie]

:)):))I have often told the story about the guy who blew up his pecker ... my sister works in a hospital and a guy came in one night with his penis blown up. He'd been using one of those 'enhancers' and apparently something went bad wrong........ :eek:


That guy knew it was gonna be a long shot it would work.:))

[sadiepie]

Hairy balls

[TW-Andrea]

Thanks for giving me a heart attack at 24yrs old from fright

You're most welcome. Glad I could be of service.:evil: Thank God my post is the only place we will ever see those 2 words together.:pray:

[ConstitutionHugger]

You're most welcome. Glad I could be of service.:evil: Thank God my post is the only place we will ever see those 2 words together.:pray:

I hope you are right but as Einstein put it "the only two things that are infinate are the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure of the former"

[JimGP20]

Twenty Seven

[Dragon1963]

Dental Drill

[putputpanorama]

maybe tommrow

[putputpanorama]

accidental vesectomy

[Panhead0422]

intentional emasculation.

[ConstitutionHugger]

Twenty Seven

I don get it

[JimGP20]

I don get it

Right now they have twenty six. I don't want to see them get twenty seven. We're talking baseball here.

[nortman]

"That's it?"
:))Those words have never been heard in my house.

Says something about Marines, though. :mrgreen:








Just don't make the punishment too painful, please.

[Army Wife]

Just don't make the punishment too painful, please.



HEY FW Did you see This???


Just trying to help out Nortman :mrgreen:

[nortman]

HEY FW Did you see This???


Just trying to help out Nortman :mrgreen:
:rolleyes:Thanks for the assist. Will you send flowers to my funeral?

[Panhead0422]

:rolleyes:Thanks for the assist. Will you send flowers to my funeral?

Are you sure that enough will be left to make a funeral necessary?:mrgreen:

[Army Wife]

:rolleyes:Thanks for the assist. Will you send flowers to my funeral?

Just trying to lend a hand there my friend...would you prefer daisies or carnations or the odd bird of paradise?? :mrgreen:

[melinda]

Elderly Nudist

:eek:

[melinda]

dear lord


not two words I hate to hear together, just a reaction.

yep, yep